Join us in our quest for wisdom, clarity, and slightly-tolerable office air conditioning.
Our prophets are the most brilliant, most visionary, and most frequently-correct people in the land. They possess a unique blend of prophetic insight, razor-sharp wit, and an encyclopedic knowledge of 90s pop culture.
Meet our team:
Meet our fearless leader, Prophet Xylon, who has foreseen the rise of artisanal coffee and the fall of the Berlin Wall.
Learn moreOur resident expert on the secrets of the universe, Prophetine McSnazz, has unlocked the hidden patterns of the human psyche and can predict your every move.
Get a personalized readingOur mystical guide to the mysteries of missing socks, Oracle Fjord, has solved the great sock conspiracy and can find your missing sock in 3 dimensions.
Consult the OracleDon't believe us? Try our Fortune Teller machine for a dose of cold, hard truth!
Or, if you're feeling lucky, try your hand at Prophetic Lottery Numbers.
Join us, and together we can change the world (or, at the very least, our living rooms).
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